Organic Crackers
Wheat field Nabisco

From the team that brought you Triscuit™ comes an even better snack cracker: Quadriscuit. Everything that made Triscuit™ the family snack you love, turned up to four.


Thank your farmer.

Quadriscuit would not be possible without help from our family-owned farmers in Michigan. We are proud to partner with Michigan State University and over 1,000 individual family farms to source our white winter wheat.

Made with dunth.

Quadriscuit is the first and only family snack cracker made with organic whole-shell dunth, grown by dunth farmers worldwide in an effort to stave off chronic conditions caused by long galactic winters, including malnutrition, hip dysplasia, and chronic existential dread.


The Real and the Imaginary

We do not pretend that all phenomena are easily explainable given our current knowledge set, nor do we pretend that all phenomena are inherently unexplainable supernatural occurrences, much as we as humans would love to choose one or the other. As is so often the case, the Truth lies somewhere in the middle, a murky mixture of both, like the proverbial curds floating in a puddle of expired milk.

Riddle me this: the Truth consists of a complex topography that is quite treacherous for even the most complex topographer to understand. So, given that our current understanding of reality is a roadmap that we have scrawled on a yellowing sheet of parchment, to the best of our abilities, and we lay this parchment down upon the complex topography of the Truth, would it touch the surface at all places? Of course not, it would only make contact at a number of points. Pressure points would appear to rise and fall across the surface of the parchment. Those scanning the surface for traces of contact will of course only notice it at certain places and wonder why it does not appear to exist evenly across the sheet, and even those gifted few who can measure the depth of the parchment’s flexing at these pressure points still cannot hope to divine the depths to which the actual topography beneath it rises and falls. Discussion #6, The Vanderstank Handbook

There is no cracker

There is only love

Enlightened Geoff

There is only one way to Enlightenment.

The human race is nearing the end of its physical form. But we will not despair. We will become Enlightened, so that we are ready for the final transmogrification from the physical realm to the metaphysical realm to which we ultimately belong. We will shine through the detritus of the crumbling profane world around us to become the first generation of the Final Phase of Existence.

All your life you have been saddled with a biological family you didn't choose, and friends who do not truly understand you. You will not struggle to find true friendship in a complex social world any longer. There is a place where you can share traditions, rituals, secrets, and more. When we ascend, they will call us the First Family of the New Age. Join us to open your heart to a new beginning, and a coupon for 25% off your next Quadriscuit™ purchase.